And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
