Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
