And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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