Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
