discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
operation harelip BJ is a go
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
