Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize