have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize
