then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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