But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
