i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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