All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
