I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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