Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
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