Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize