I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Randomize
