No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
