I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I need to calm my uterus...
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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