Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
