should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
