Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I need a burrito and a hug.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
