If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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