what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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