I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
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