Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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