i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
another moral hangover. fuck.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
