So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I wanna passion pit in your ass
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
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