Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
