We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
