I would go down on you faster than GM stock
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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