We're facebook friends in real life
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
