Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
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