Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
