obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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