After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Randomize
