I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
