The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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