i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
