God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Tornado booty call.. dedication
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
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