hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
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