There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
