We're like a lot better than the average bears
i don't like sucking hair
I am spending my child support on dildos
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
