I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Randomize
