six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
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