i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
