Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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