FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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