I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Randomize
