Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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