maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
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