Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
