so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
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