Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
i dont even know how to be here
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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