shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize
