i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
